TAXES

On 15 April, every year,

Most among us wipe a tear

As into Federal coffers seep

The meager coin we hoped to keep.

One third of every working day,

Our efforts will support and pay

For programs, arms or just because

It’s Washington. That’s what one does!

   It’s hard to write about taxes when I sort of agree we have to pay them. I realize it’s a necessary evil, and a rather small pill to swallow in return for the privilege of living in the good old USA…a small, bitter pill, nonetheless. Most of my life I worked in service jobs, starting with waitress (we called them that in those days.) in a coffeehouse to bartender, a job that definitely looked more glamorous than it is. I never made much more than minimum wage, (not counting tips, which we didn’t, in those days.) I also worked in show business, and did okay there, and that’s where I first became acquainted with our tax process. In show biz, you’re pretty much working for yourself, so you have to see to it you’re paying your quarterly taxes. Please believe me. I learned this the hard way, so I know.

   “Pretend it’s not your money,” a helpful friend advised. “Take one-third of whatever you earn and put it in a savings account. Pay your taxes out of that. Anything left over, you get to keep.”

   Great advice. By the time I took it, I owed $1500 to the Feds, (a gigantic sum, in those days.) That’s when I discovered the best people to owe money to are the good old IRS.  You can make almost any deal with them and as long as you send the money each month, even if it’s only $5 or $10, they’ll leave you alone. Eventually, I got it paid, and I never did that again.

   Now I’m “retired”, whatever that means. For me it means no more real estate, and no more property management, a job I’m delighted to turn over to my son, Duff. I haven’t stopped working, tho’, and I still pay taxes. I just mailed the checks off yesterday. It’s a strange feeling. I feel bad having to pay them and good about doing it, all at the same time. At least I know I’ve done my part to keep the lights on in Washington.